| balloons.. oh no, balloons.. |
[07.18.06] |
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Yearg...
Do you ever feel out of place in your own skin? like it doesn't fit anymore? I wish i was some sort of snake so I could shead my skin. That may make life more interesting. I haven't had my meds in 4 days and it's fucking with my mind. I either need to get laid or get some more medication soon so I don't kill myself. Damn sexual side effects. I've been having the weirdest dreams, too. If any dream I have told you about before you thought was weird, it's about 10 times weireder without my meds. I need to buy milk. And juice. I should be moving in today. Holy crap, is that the time? fuck shit fuck
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| and if i'm six feet tall why do feel small, here beneath the posters on my wall? |
[07.14.06] |
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(Click here to post your own answers for this meme.)
| ✓ I miss somebody right now. (Even though they havn't left yet) |
✓ I don't watch much TV these days. (With only two channels it gets old fast) |
✓ I own lots of books. (mostly manga... okay maybe halfnhalf) |
| ✓ I wear glasses or contact lenses. (fear the four eyes) |
✓ I love to play video games. |
✓ I've tried marijuana. |
| ✓ I've watched porn movies. (mentally scarring at a young age) |
× I have been the psycho-ex in a past relationship. (@_@) |
✓ I believe honesty is usually the best policy. (Not that I actually tell the truth all the time) |
| ✓ I curse sometimes. (A lot more lately) |
✓ I have changed a lot mentally over the last year. (for better or for worse..?) |
× I carry my knife/razor everywhere with me. |
( it goes on... )
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| Shit |
[07.08.06] |
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Cute is What we Aim For |
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ARG! I feel so angry but I don't really have a reason. What the hell is up with me? I want to go out and do stuff with people but I'm afraid I'll snap at them like I did yesterday (btw I'm really sorry about that, you were just trying to help). Maybe it's just that I'm afraid of change. All this moving stuff makes me on edge. I hate having to justify all my pack-rat objects I have no use for and then lug them to a new location. Especialy to Cole, that ass. Yeah he'll help, but he's going to make fucking comments about all my shit the whole time. I know I have a problem, I've slowly been wittling it down but its really hard, okay? I wish he'd leave me alone. Also when I even suggest to my mother that I want to get rid of some of the toys I have collected over the years, she says, "You want to get rid of THOSE? Do you remember what I paid for them??" It makes me feel so guilty, but I'm 20 fucking years old! Yes, I want to get rid of my TOYS! Well, most of them. I can't help that you spoiled me rotten and bought me everything I asked for. I hate to think what she'll say when I tell her I don't really want my beanie babies any more. *shudder* The next thing on my sorting list is my stuffed animals, I have WAY to many. Gotta let go. ERG, just thinking about it makes me nervous. Hiding from my problems isn't working.
I have this huge bruise on my leg that everyone says looks like a galaxy. I think it looks more like a nebula. I took a picture of it, but I havn't been able to upload it so oh well. You will have to see me in person if you want to admire it. I wish I knew how to play the bass. I have no one to blame but myself for my lack of talent.
Man, I have got to stop being so depressed. Usually Joce can cheer me up no problem but she's working today. I am at a loss as to what to do. At least I don't have to babysit today. My head still hurts from yesterday. I don't like kids... at all. Too much noise. Perhaps later I will mature and feel resposible enough to have children but right now, fuck no. My sister wanted me to babysit her youngest for the summer while she's at work. I couldn't help but think that either the kid or me would not last that long. Sure, she's cute and loveable but that's when she's not crying or pooping. 10 months old. Talk to me after they can use the toilet by themselves. Not to sound mean or anything, but I'm a terrible babysitter. I really tried yesterday, really. In the end I was ready to throttle the older one because she kept making high pitched whinning (horses are her favourite animal) noises, I really don't think I changed the baby's diaper enough (for some reason this just didn't occur to me for the longest time), the baby fell over and hurt herself three times, and I stressed out so much I forgot to eat lunch. At least I remembered to let the dog out occasionally. I think the best part of the day was when the baby took her nap. Oh, the peace. I am not ready for the responsibility of child rearing. I don't understand how teen moms can do it. That's probably the reason I don't want to have sex until I am married. I don't think I would be able to raise a child on my own. I want someone commited to helping me before I'd even THINK about having a baby. Even then I'd much rather adopt. So many children without homes, why bring another one into the world. Oh well. I think I've ranted enough. I think this might be the longest post I've ever done. To copy spiffy, if only once, I'm going to sign off.
, no-thumbs jack
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| Die young and save yourself |
[06.26.06] |
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So.. funerals are depressing.. yep.. big surprise there. I did get to learn my friend is going to Japan AGAIN ugh.. I'm jealous.. yet too lazy to save up and go with her.
I seem to be stuck in a rut without 4-wheel drive to help me out. I feel like I'm waiting for something to happen, but I don't know what to do to get things started.
My birthday is tomorrow.. the big 2-Oh. I feel stranger now than when I turned 19. I'm actually not going to be a teenager anymore. Geh.
..Party? I have no place to throw it or money to throw into it. Another birthday without any sort of real celebration.. I've kind of gotten used to it.
Arg.. I hope no one actually reads my LJ. All I seem to do on here is bitch and moan.
C'mon! Happy thoughts! Happy thoughts!
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..Aw, fuck it..
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| Note to you! |
[06.25.06] |
Halo thar Jess.... :D
Okies. Your new layout is about 90% finnished! :D
The other 10% is something your better off doing. like adding links and changing titles and junk. Please DO NOT remove that credit in your USER INFO until you get a new layout. If you wanna edit the layout, a good tip would be to have a safty save of the CSS in note pad just in case you screw up and lose all you've done.
The layout doesn't look nice with a default icon, so I got rid of that. We're also given 3 more icons, so I've added 3 of my own. Your free to change them and what not. I can make some with images of your choice.
Also, learn to credit icons via -> ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) rock_dy
( < lj/ user/="username"/> ) Just remove the /'s.
Done. Enjoy!
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| He is the lamb, she is the slaughter |
[06.25.06] |
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Brand New |
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Our water has been turned off so they can clean the water main... I wanna have a shower! GAH! Caterday was a lil delayed but enjoyable none the less. The Ex sucked monkey ass this year. If I even get the slightest bit excited next year, someone please remind me of this year. I got home and played Scrabble with my Grandmum, she's so awesome. I was very pleased with myself at being able to spell 'zebras' although it wasn't all that great point wise. I am sitting here wishing someone would come on msn so we can do something, but not willing to phone anyone. I still need to shower. Damn that blue flag sitting on the lawn. How it mocks me! My lj layout really sucks but I'm to lazy to fix it.. if someone could point me in the right direction it would be appreciated. So.. ugly.. it is now.. bah
edit: fear the pinkness
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| Which one's for you? |
[05.04.06] |
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Dude, "It prob'ly won't matter to much later, but.. ooooh, it feels good to spill the beans" TOTALLY CAME BACK TO BITE ME IN THE ASS! Yeah.. it happened awhile ago but.. I havn't felt like posting in awhile
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| ...And throw me in with it.. |
[07.07.05] |
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Mitch |
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 | You scored as Eaten. Your death will be death by wild animals. You will probably get eaten by a bear or shark something because you don't know the natural safety precautions and are ignorant.
Eaten | | 87% | Accident | | 80% | Suicide | | 73% | Posion | | 73% | Cut Throat | | 53% | Natural Causes | | 53% | Disappear | | 53% | Disease | | 47% | Stabbed | | 33% | Bomb | | 33% | Suffocated | | 33% | Drowning | | 33% | Gunshot | | 20% | </td>
How Will You Die??
created with QuizFarm.com |
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| betty i'm a dreamer i'm not a vicious schemer oh betty won't you- oh, fuck it |
[03.01.05] |
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The Future Freaks Me Out - Motion City Soundtrack |
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BOO-YA! I finished a crossword!! An actual one! From a newspaper!! Yeah! Go me! I is teh smart!
In math today I found out my mark is 103% O_o WTF? That's only ever happened to me once before and that was in some easy computer elective class-doody-thingie.. But this is math! PRE-CAL MATH! Geh.. o_O Now I just have to keep it up ^-^ Maybe I can have 100% for this term's mark XD
The ceiling stopped leaking at least.. That was a weird day. I got to look in the attic tho! It was awesome.. it was all cold and dark.. and reminded me of the attic at the end of The Grudge (Japanese ver.)
Then I went to visit Jocelyn and played spider solitare for a few hours while she watched the oscars (booooring blah) but i got to barrow awesome CDs.. Jocey is the best.. We were supposed to play Snow Badminton, but I got tired and lazy/cold after I walked to her house after a long bus ride.. I got to read a bit of her JTHM comic book, damn is that thing ever thick.Although for supper her dad got chinese food, which to which most people would say "w00t" or something to that effect, but it lacked one thing... a dish without meat ;_; Momo ate nothing ;_; Although we almost made cake.. maybe next weekend XD
On Sat I have a birthday party to go to so I'm not sure I'll make it to WAC, but we'll see.
Gah I wanna play TV bingo! It's so much fun!! gah.. always so busy on saturday tho.. *tear*
Moo moooooooo.. I don't know what to do about this person I like >_< Gar.. I know they like me too but I don't know how much, and a certain other person is standing in the way.. and that's all I'm gonna say.. yes, because it doesn't really involve anyone that reads this (Especially Steph, because, I don't care what anyone else says, or how much we have in common I do not like Iain, and really, it pisses me off when they say that shtuff, because I'm pretty sure they are doing it just to piss you off. How stupid is that?) Anyway, nobody really cares about my fucked up love life I'm sure, I just like to complain. Maybe I'll look back on this and be like.. "Ohhh yeah! Hey, I remember feeling that way.. damn.. was that ever stupid!" and have a good laugh.
Oh yeah! That reminds me!! My friend Tyler told me that he likes one of my other friends, Kyle, but not to tell anyone!! Well.. noone from my school reads this so.. TYLER LIKES KYLE!! TYLER LIKES KYLE!! TYLER LIKES KYLE!! TYLER LIKES KYLE!! TYLER LIKES KYLE!! TYLER LIKES KYLE!!
Ahh.. I just can't keep the secrets in!!! It prob'ly won't matter to much later, but.. ooooh, it feels good to spill the beans even though no one reading will care in the slightest.. XD
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| Remember a kiss is like kerosene.. |
[02.27.05] |
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Blue and Yellow - The Used |
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UGH! WAC is a scary place without Dy ;_; It was a definate "sausage party" and for a long time there were only two girls (that's inculing me) That is until Steph and Iain came. Then there were.. uh.. three! OH YEAH! I CAN COUNT! w33t! Lol I hope I can get some more money to go to Green Day, maybe I'll see Steph there XD
But I feel really bad because some jackass was being mean to Steph and I just didn't know what to do. Loud stupid people scare me, I wish Dy had been there to say something funny or insulting to that guy.. maybe it would have relived some tension. Grr.. I'm pretty sure there are laws that prevent and procecute people who harm animals! If not.. I sure as hell will. Arg.. I hope she doesn't think it was me that said anything bad about her, she really seems like a nice person to me.. When she left the room the dumbass (who i don't know the name of, really.. and now I don't really want to) said that they should write a scedual of Steph's PMS days. OH that made me so mad! If WAC was some kind of workplace that could get fired for... uh.. sexual harassment or something. Although I don't really remember what I said, I'm pretty sure I yelled and Steph heard.. geh.. poor Steph... I hope she calls me, and isn't mad at me.. geh...
On a lighter note I think I made a new friend in Kathrine (sp? or is that even right? ugh stupid goldfish memory..) She's going to lend me manga and vice versa XD And I got free candy and strawberries so it wasn't a total loss.. meh.. Are they going to play Air again?!? No Air last time, no Air this time, wtf? Was it only two episodes?!? I really liked that one! Gao~! XP
Meh, me and Jocey's plans for roadtrip next month seem to be coming loose at the seams. My mom's car has now been in three, yes THREE! accidents just this week!!! OMGWTF?~?~!?!?! So.. angry... *implodes*
You know, having this blog thingie is actually kinda nice. I can complain about what ever I want yet, if people don't wanna know they can just stop reading, no skin of my back. I think I'll complain in here more often XP
WTF? Water is leaking from the ceiling..
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| And now for something completely different.. |
[02.24.05] |
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Mortal Kombat Movie Soundtrack.. w00t |
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Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
Wow.. that actually makes me feel better...
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| Dear Diary, My teen angst bullshit has a body count. |
[02.07.05] |
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You Know What They Do To Guys Like Us In Prison - MCR |
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WIGG-I-TY BOO! ANOTHER POST!!
Wow, am I ever lazy. I keep thinging of all these weird things that I should put in here but when it come to actually turning my computer on, I'm just like... meh. Right now I'm making pajama pants and being mad at Jared cuz he never phoned me yesterday, Gao! But the pajama pants have kick ass space ships on 'em so I'm all happy 'bout that. My cousin (who is helping me with all this) got this really hilarious fabric with Indiana Jones comic book panels on it. Her pajama pants are going to be awesome!
All last week I was sick as a dog because my mom had no money to pay for my fucking medication. Now I can't miss any more school or the teachers are gonna be pissed. Shit.. I really don't want to have to repeat grade 11 AGAIN! >_> Stupid.. stuff.. shit.. damn..
No school today though, thank god. I love random days off. I'm still in my pajamas XD So very lazy..
Tommorrow I get to develope my film in photos! Wee-hoo! We finally got to use real cameras, not those old fucking crappy 4x5 camera. Man, did those ever suck.
On a side note, I really like that Air anime.. If they continue to play it I will come to WAC every weekend for sure! lol Ranma just wasn't enough to drag me there, especially because now my mom doesn't have a car. Then again.. Grant is usually willing to give me a ride.. when I'm not late, which I usually am when I sleep in 'til 3pm o_O
I actually found out the daughter of my sister's boyfriend likes Invader Zim! Even though she's in Grade 3 I said "Lets hang out some time!" 'cause I'm a big nerd.
Dude, I was looking over my lil post here and I said "like" WAY to many times. Damn, what the hell! Gotta stop that.. so retarded... must.. fix..
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| I have thrown proper grammer out the window. It's time to make some new friends. |
[01.04.05] |
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Man, having a dark line carved into your flesh isn't as pleasant as it sounds. At least I didn't cry or anything. It is finished, it's not some weird frowny face like some other guy got. I is not a wuss!! For future reference of any who want to get a tattoo, AVOID BONE! Hurts twice as much there. While we were there I was telling my sister about possible future peircings and she offered to pay for getting my lip peirced. Meh, I dunno.. I think I might rather the three eyebrow ones instead.
On another note, I am wearing glow-in-the-dark pajama bottoms!! w00t!! They are my cousin's but.. she made them too big, they fit me! Now I only have to bug her to make new ones so that I can have the too big ones..
Last night I played a fun new game my uncle got for Christmas, Ninja Burger. It is the hilarious. At first I lost all my honour and had to go back home to apoligize to my ancestors, but then the new ninja I got kicked ass. He was tall and skinny so if you got the lampshade his disguise was an atomatic success! Yeah, my mom won O_o
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| Wow, is this thing ever fucked up on my computer... |
[01.02.05] |
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NONE FUCK |
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Geh, I have joined this to please some folks and their demanding-ness, though I don't know if I'll post that often. It's cold in my basement, but I'm extreamly bored and wish dearly that my friend will phone me back and ask me to do something. Meh.. Tomorrow I get my tattoo.. I hope it won't hurt to much. I didn't cry when I got my eyebrow peirced so I hope I won't cry when I get this done. A part of me really wants to get two more eyebrow peircings like Musica in Rave. It looks the awesome on him, but I dunno how good it would look on me.
I went downtown with the Jared but we didn't do much.. I was saddened by the lack of adventure that took place. Shmeh.. I wish I had some AOL CDs to have another ninja battle with but they were all out at the bank. Maybe I'll try Canadian Tire.. i think i saw some there.
My computer is being an ass and not playing my CD so I'm gonna stop now. it is the cold.
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